Thursday, 27th September 2007

To mark the start of The Secret Diary Of A Call Girl on ITV2 tonight, we've uploaded a number of high quality pictures to the Billie Piper gallery.

Wednesday, 26th September 2007

Added a new gallery for Vanessa Hudgens.

Added pictures from the Resident Evil: Extinction premiere to the Ali Larter and Milla Jovovich galleries.

Sunday, 23rd September 2007

Added a dedicated page for screen captures from Meatloaf's Rock & Roll Dreams Come Through video to the Angelina Jolie gallery.

Added a dedicated page for screen captures from Live At Wembley to the Atomic Kitten gallery.

Added dedicated pages for Like This and Survivor screen captures to the Kelly Rowland gallery.

Added dedicated pages for screen captures from At Night I Pray and Talk To Me (both by Wild Orchid) to the Stacy Ferguson gallery.

Added a dedicated page for screen captures from Now That You Got It to the Gwen Stefani gallery.

Added a dedicated page for screen captures from Common's Drivin' Me Wild video to the Lily Allen gallery.

Added a dedicated page for screen captures from Stone Sour's Rock Am Ring 2007 concert to the Corey Taylor gallery.

Added a new gallery for Eve.

Added a new gallery for Leann Rimes plus a dedicated page for screen captures from her new video for Nothin' Better To Do.

Added a new gallery for Aly & AJ plus dedicated pages for screen captures from the videos for Chemicals React, Greatest Time Of Year, Potential Breakup Song and Rush.

(SARCASM. This post is sarcasm, not news. AKA if you can't take a joke, don't read it.) 

lalate news takes the best and worse, from Phil Spector's hair, to Courtney Love's horrible breasts, to O.J. Simpson's "What you take in Vegas, stays in Vegas", and put them all together and picked our FIVE top crazy celebrity costume ideas for you this Halloween, if you are a guy, a girl, or Chris Crocker. 

Read the story now here at lalate news!

Images as previously credited

Reading a recent interview in Metrosource with comedian Laura Kightlinger, creator and star of the series "The Minor Accomplishments of Jackie Woodman,"I came across this ridiculous question.

I recently saw you on an episode of Tenacious D from 1999 - it looks like you haven't aged a day. What's your secret?
I like to think I've been kind of preserved in disappointment. It keeps me young.

Er, right, that and a crazy amount of plastic surgery! Elephant. In. The. Room. Let's be honest and call a spade a scalpel. The woman could double for Cher.

This takes nothing away from her um, accomplishments, I've enjoyed Kightlinger since her stand-up days and think she's a vastly talented writer and performer. She's under no obligation to confess the obvious.

But if your the interviewer and you're digging for dirt, hoping she'll fess up to going under the knife, why pose the question in that manner?

Yesterday, this site's hit meter went out of sight,

I wonder why? Could it be that the main post, Sex with Aunty Em, included the word "sex?" Could it be that the title could have been "Sex with a Baboon" or "Sex with a Freshly-Shelled Walnut" and worked just as well? Naw. No one cares about sex. Everyone wants to read about politics.

If you believe that, I have a large body of water in the Sierras straddling the California and Nevada borders for sale.

Since opening this site in April 2007, we've categorized our posts under several headings—politics, power, current events, Bay Area Communities, Demographics, humor, war, sex, scandals, Paris Hilton, and more, too many to list here. I'll give you three guesses which of these draws the most visitors.

Hint: Nancy Pelosi. "Tee hee," as my best friend would say. Nancy drew about two clicks and one of those was apparently from a congenital Pelosi watcher who proceeded to rip her to shreds. Seems all of the political heat originates somewhere to the right of center on the Lib-Con line.

The seeming lack of political temperature in the L quadrant may mean bad news for the Democrats if the Republicans manage to get a measure on the ballot to change California's method of counting presidential electoral votes. Now, if someone introduced a proposal to require naked pages in the State Assembly, the L's would come out of the woodworks.

Do C's have sex? Below the radar they just might. SFist points out that the man behind the "Create a Republican World" ballot initiative was once sued for biting a woman's butt in a bar, whereupon he declared that she should have been flattered. A jury later flattered her to the tune of $25,000. Is that the kind of man we want running California? Hmmmmm.

My point here is that Paris Hilton, et al, are necessary to the perpetuation of the blog-o-sphere, yes, but not everyone has the superstructure, beauty, and stupidity to become a bimbo. California, like all states, is filled with those blessed with intelligence. Where are the symmetrical and asymmetrical Mensa members when the L's need them?

By the way, we fully intend to continue our policy of mixing sex and politics. Remember these words:

To everything there is a season
A time for every purpose under the sun.
A time to be born and a time to die.
A time for sex and a time for politics.

If you have that sinking feeling that all may not be well in the loaded arena of personal relationships, (but as usual you have no idea what you've done), it may simply be time for a new hat.

Women like men who wear hats - they find 'em sexy. I know this by extensive personal experience (well, if I were a woman, I'd find myself incredibly attractive in my Borsalino). Anyway, it's not just my opinion. I was reading one of those women's magazines (at the check-out! I was bored!) and a reader survey in it confirmed that most women find men who wear hats to be exciting, confident and fun to be around.

That's why you can take a guy like Pete Doherty, who isn't a man you'd immediately label "handsome", slap a fedora on his head, and he lands a supermodel girl friend. Look at Brad Pitt. He didn't even wear hats until he wed Angelina Jolie--now he's sporting fedoras and newsboys all the time, in an obvious attempt to spice up his rather bland blond look and keep the old spark bright.

So there it is, men. Forget couples counseling. Get yerself a hat.

Thanks for reading,
Steve Singer
Relationship Guru *cough*
and CEO Hartford York

If you now see a ray of hope for your future, you may need more than free updates of this blog by email or RSS. But sign on anyway.

categories: fur hats fall hats autumn hats hats for winter wool caps hats women's hats men's hats fashion humorstraw hats summer hats panama hats straw fedora hats straw fedoras winter hats fedoras cowboy hats leather hats Kangol hats Borsalino hats Scala hats Stetson hats Wigens hats

So today at Wow! Your Vows... Now wedding chapel & pawn shop, we had a celebrity wedding.  Well... not really.  The bride was an Anna Nicole Smith look-a-like and her groom looked just like that MTV cartoon, the one with the blond hair (I think his name was Beevis).

I mean, Anna Nicole is dead (R.I.P.) and Beevis is just a cartoon person, so it wasn't really them.

But still!

Art-object rendering of the Happy Couple

Well, our second Trixie's All Fun Book Club meeting was even more fun than the first -- thanks in large part to amazing homemade ice cream provided with love by our neighbors, the Little Red Bike Cafe.  We were served a banana split, of all things, with a scoop of salted caramel (Umm, yes), vanilla, and the piece de resistance -- cherry coconut with chocolate chunks (unbelievable!).  I scream, you scream, we all scream for Little Red Bike Ice Cream, yaaaaaay! 

We discussed Jennifer Weiner's "Goodnight Nobody" among other things, including that feeling of being a fish out of water that the author evokes so well.  We also laughed about our various husbands' choice of attire and what it's like to lose yourself in roles like "wife," "mother," and "partner."   We're sure almost everyone has experienced that at one time or another.  Next month we'll meet on Thursday, 10/18 and we'll be reading the Nicholas Sparks favorites "The Notebook" and "The Wedding" if we can get to them both.  Mark your calendars! 

In the salon, we bemoaned Wayne Newton's surprising lack of dance talent in "Dancing With the Stars" and the fact that the judges were too starstruck to vote him off.  You would think a guy who's been entertaining for his whole life would have picked up a few moves, eh? Oh well, thank goodness he can sing!  Danka Schoen, Wayne, baby. 

I'm single right now. I've slept alone for 62 nights and felt every last one. I have no significant other, I touch no-one and no-one touches me (apart from the woman I met at Vauxhall Station in last Friday's strange episode - check it out below).

Despite this, women still warm my days. I feel a visceral pleasure when I meet an attractive woman. I feel it when watching TV. I've been transfixed by Billie Piper as Belle Du Jour. I look at her gorgeous exaggerated features and absurdly sexy body and just luxuriate in this virtual and vicarious pleasure. I'm like a cat squirming in a shaft of sunlight and for a moment, I'm blissfully happy. 

Kim Kardashian is denying rumors she got butt implants and blames her curves on being Armenian, though she also mentions that she isn't against plastic surgery. She tells King magazine:

"Everyone now says I have a fake butt or butt implant. I'm Armenian; you should see all the women in my family. The women have bigger breasts and bigger butts. That's how I was born. I can't help it. I'm not gonna fight it. I definitely need to work out more and tone up, but I'm proud of my body... [although] I'm not against [plastic surgery]."

And here's some photos Kim did for Complex magazine. Although they don't quite capture just how massive her ass really is. I guess they couldn't afford a big enough lens. It actually looks like they airbrushed her ass down one or eighteen sizes. I guess printing it actual size would use up all the trees of the world. And yeah, maybe that doesn't make any sense, but maybe you don't make any sense. Ever thought about that?

Maybe I'm just getting old and losing my memory, but did Kim Kardashian always look like this? What happened to her lips? Did she get lip lipo? Does that even exist? Because I remember her having lips, and now, well, she doesn't. Was it lip injections? Was it all makeup? How far away is the sun? Is Darryl really going to prom with Jenny? These questions and more, all answered tomorrow on a very special Superficial.